[ Oh- well. Rin hadn't really been planning to say all that. So he spends a little bit of time just freaking out inside his head. The panic is sudden and all-consuming, like the turn of the sea from calm water to a storm.
It takes him a moment to hear past the alarms blaring in his head and actually make sense of what Haru had just said.
And the panic gives way, steadily, to something much more familiar. It's the same fear and anticipation that comes before a race, but with none of the focus. This is uncharted territory, after all, so he's trying to take in as much of it as he can. ]
Oh.
[ Oh. The nervousness is lingering, and his brain isn't entirely keeping up with what all of this means, but there's warmth now too. A juvenile, jittery kind. ]
[ he's grateful he can feel rin's emotions, because they're historically great at misunderstanding each other. he shares his panic, verging into dread, when it slowly turns into something buzzy and sweet instead.
it still feels like they need to go run a lap, but it's spurned on by affection. a summery feeling, bright and new and energizing.
but also a little confused. ]
...I don't know.
[ he doesn't know what he's doing. wow, to be an idiot who has ignored romance his whole life. but even if they don't know where this is going or what to do, he takes rin's hand again and it feels fine not to have the answers yet. ]
What do you mean "I don't know"? What do you mean it's okay not to have answers?? (Rin can't read Haru's meta, but the sentiment stands.)
He looks down at the hand holding his, feeling flustered at the gesture in a way that he wasn't before, but also... digging his heels in. Not as content to let things lie ambiguously. Rin has always been quick, and decisive, with clarity of vision.
He wants answers now. ]
What? Wait. [ ??? ] Are you saying... that you want to date me for real?
[ god, rin!! can you please respect his ambiguity here. please just let him have this one date and spiral. if haru had it his way, he'd leisurely figure out whatever this is at his own pace. maybe someday simply assume they are dating.
instead there's a stirring feeling of uncertainty, a little cornered, but at least with rin's it's easy to play it off as exasperation. ]
Maybe.
[ is that what he's saying...? he'd really rather not answer this, always cautious of making mistakes when he lets his emotions get the better of him around rin, but that jittery feeling gets the better of him eventually. he's not very good at lying anyway. he admits, quietly, ] ...Yes.
[ He cannot. Doesn't he always go racing ahead anyway? Unfortunately, this time the two of them are attached, so Haru has no choice but to match his pace for now. As if Rin doesn't try dragging Haru along in nearly all aspects of their life.
He doesn't even attempt to be subtle as he waits for Haru's answer, holding tight to his hand and leaned forward as though he might miss it if all of his attention isn't focused on whatever Haru says next.
The "maybe" is disappointing, but the "yes" sends his heartbeat into the stratosphere. ]
Really? [ What? That's such a stupid answer. Haru never says anything unless he's sure of it. ] I mean... okay.
[ The way Rin has been on awkward, fumbling dates in the past, watched more sappy movies than he can count, and swum in the world's most prestigious pools but nothing quite compares to the warm excitement that floods him now. The feeling of want that had nestled in his heart the first time he'd seen Haru in the water, and grown and changed like the sea under the phases of the moon.
A small exhale, and then a smile. ]
Okay, let's do it then. But only if you're serious.
[ More confident now, even in uncharted waters, but change and new horizons had never scared him. Not as long he knows he doesn't have to surrender Haru to wander them.
He shifts their hands to lace their fingers together, smile turning a little goading. ]
[ he scoffs a little in response, though it doesn't have any bite to it, a steady warmth answering for him instead. of course he's serious? he's been obsessed with rin since elementary school. his entire life trajectory's changed because of him multiple times now. even today, in this very conversation, he's just been dragged into rin's current and made to follow along.
and that's fine. it's where he wants to be. hearing rin agree, seeing him smile—haru's nervousness persists, stubborn and buzzing, but it's joined with the same, fluttering awe and affection he's felt time and time again, swimming and racing and making promises and reunions under dormant cherry trees. it's all very new, but at the same time, it's not really. not in his case.
he doesn't move on yet. ]
—Rin.
[ trying to get his attention, even though he obviously has it. ]
[ because he's still cursed, kind of amazed that they're both acknowledging this is a date, and he's a little put out that rin got ahead of him in this conversation.
so to keep things even, he keeps hold of rin's hand, dips in, and gives him a quick kiss.
[ Are they... just competing... to win at relationships..........? Could they be that stupid..............................?
Anyway. Immediately turning red while the room practically explodes with a combination of embarrassment and delight. Unfortunately for Rin's place in the relationship competition, he's momentarily stunned, standing in place like he can't believe just happened.
This from the guy who's only initiated a hug once in the 7 years they've known each other. ]
... What's gotten into you all of a sudden...
[ Briefly touching his lips like whoa did that just happen before he squints at Haru suspiciously, trying to understand if this is going to be normal behaviour between them now.
Well.. They can figure it out after looking at fish. ]
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It takes him a moment to hear past the alarms blaring in his head and actually make sense of what Haru had just said.
And the panic gives way, steadily, to something much more familiar. It's the same fear and anticipation that comes before a race, but with none of the focus. This is uncharted territory, after all, so he's trying to take in as much of it as he can. ]
Oh.
[ Oh. The nervousness is lingering, and his brain isn't entirely keeping up with what all of this means, but there's warmth now too. A juvenile, jittery kind. ]
So... what then?
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it still feels like they need to go run a lap, but it's spurned on by affection. a summery feeling, bright and new and energizing.
but also a little confused. ]
...I don't know.
[ he doesn't know what he's doing. wow, to be an idiot who has ignored romance his whole life. but even if they don't know where this is going or what to do, he takes rin's hand again and it feels fine not to have the answers yet. ]
I guess we finish this date.
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What do you mean "I don't know"? What do you mean it's okay not to have answers?? (Rin can't read Haru's meta, but the sentiment stands.)
He looks down at the hand holding his, feeling flustered at the gesture in a way that he wasn't before, but also... digging his heels in. Not as content to let things lie ambiguously. Rin has always been quick, and decisive, with clarity of vision.
He wants answers now. ]
What? Wait. [ ??? ] Are you saying... that you want to date me for real?
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instead there's a stirring feeling of uncertainty, a little cornered, but at least with rin's it's easy to play it off as exasperation. ]
Maybe.
[ is that what he's saying...? he'd really rather not answer this, always cautious of making mistakes when he lets his emotions get the better of him around rin, but that jittery feeling gets the better of him eventually. he's not very good at lying anyway. he admits, quietly, ] ...Yes.
no subject
He doesn't even attempt to be subtle as he waits for Haru's answer, holding tight to his hand and leaned forward as though he might miss it if all of his attention isn't focused on whatever Haru says next.
The "maybe" is disappointing, but the "yes" sends his heartbeat into the stratosphere. ]
Really? [ What? That's such a stupid answer. Haru never says anything unless he's sure of it. ] I mean... okay.
[ The way Rin has been on awkward, fumbling dates in the past, watched more sappy movies than he can count, and swum in the world's most prestigious pools but nothing quite compares to the warm excitement that floods him now. The feeling of want that had nestled in his heart the first time he'd seen Haru in the water, and grown and changed like the sea under the phases of the moon.
A small exhale, and then a smile. ]
Okay, let's do it then. But only if you're serious.
[ More confident now, even in uncharted waters, but change and new horizons had never scared him. Not as long he knows he doesn't have to surrender Haru to wander them.
He shifts their hands to lace their fingers together, smile turning a little goading. ]
We can continue our date.
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and that's fine. it's where he wants to be. hearing rin agree, seeing him smile—haru's nervousness persists, stubborn and buzzing, but it's joined with the same, fluttering awe and affection he's felt time and time again, swimming and racing and making promises and reunions under dormant cherry trees. it's all very new, but at the same time, it's not really. not in his case.
he doesn't move on yet. ]
—Rin.
[ trying to get his attention, even though he obviously has it. ]
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Well, at this time it's only literal and not metaphorical.
He had turned to admire the fish again, but will focus his attention back on Haru, lifting a brow. ]
What?
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so to keep things even, he keeps hold of rin's hand, dips in, and gives him a quick kiss.
yay, he wins. now they can go look at fish. ]
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Anyway. Immediately turning red while the room practically explodes with a combination of embarrassment and delight. Unfortunately for Rin's place in the relationship competition, he's momentarily stunned, standing in place like he can't believe just happened.
This from the guy who's only initiated a hug once in the 7 years they've known each other. ]
... What's gotten into you all of a sudden...
[ Briefly touching his lips like whoa did that just happen before he squints at Haru suspiciously, trying to understand if this is going to be normal behaviour between them now.
Well.. They can figure it out after looking at fish. ]